A couple of weeks ago I took a step I doubt I would have if my life had not gone a bit off the rails. I was baptized again; the first time was when I was a kid in the river back home. The reason why I did it was something I noticed while writing the book, despite the circumstances being bad they worked out some way. It was not because of any plan I had, I had tried it on my own, and it was not working. I am not sure if it was luck, serendipity, God, or spirits, I am not inside all the players heads to see why. Most people come up with a story to explain things; I will go with God and stay on the path I have been traveling.
It is partly as a rebirth, shedding the past so to speak, and partly because my wife has wanted to do this together for years. We have had many bumps in the road and through it; all we had First Assembly with us. Their various counseling services, food, reaching out to our extended families in other times of loss, putting us in touch with people who can help, and interpreting for my wife during her therapy sessions; it was time to give back.
The night of the baptism, I wore a Batman shirt because when I came out of the water it will be ‘The Dark Knight Rises’. Corny, but I thought it was funny.
Every person that is dunked was given a bible and a vial of baptism tank water (before we started) as a keepsake. Our pastor wrote notes in ours, and the part that struck me was where she had written that I ‘had a servant’s heart’. My head swirled as I thought of my pen name Ronin (master less samurai) and samurai meaning ‘to serve’.
I found altruism to be a good coping mechanism, one I enjoy a lot now. In front of the crowd, she noted the change over me during the past year I teared up a little. I was happy when she said that, I worked hard to change myself into someone I would like. When your own inner critic and those that refuse to let go of the past try to bring you back down it is nice to know someone is noticing the good.