The Path Chosen

Posted in Books, Commentary, Current Events, Family, Inner Strength, Introspection, Life, Philosophy with tags , , , , , , on April 24, 2014 by Ronin

In one of the Unchained questions it asks about two of your favorite movie scenes. One is from Batman Begins (http://youtu.be/Uk280jVuH1w) the second from Captain America: The First Avenger (http://youtu.be/OdgrOdVBjBU).

Odd choices on face value, and the reason I picked them is in Batman is the Will To Act and the fact Batman is proactive, cerebral, read’s people and understands their motives. The ideal is Human Perfection.

Steve Rogers, the reasoning about that scene is he was a scrawny runt that was picked on. Something I’m familiar with. He respects the power he was given, stays a good man because he remembers when he was weak. Ideal being Humble.

The correlation: came a long way from the bullied, insecure kid. Still a long way to go, Ronin’s Journey has showed what I had become. The same type of egotistical asshole that picked on me. This trial by fire matured me. Just because you can doesn’t mean you should, or let it go to your head.

Above all…be a good man, remember that rudeness is a weak imitation of strength, your chosen family is first and no one gets left behind.

By alvincapalad-d5dz167

By alvincapalad-d5dz167

Socializing the Awkward

Posted in Books, Commentary, Introspection, Life, Suggested Reading with tags , , , , , on April 22, 2014 by Ronin

A couple of weeks ago I was given a book on cultivating relationships, mostly because I am an unsocialized introvert. I do not really know what to say in social situations, I just watch and creep people out until they say something to get a reaction out of me.

It’s titled Secret Blend; in it are seven lessons, most which mesh well with what I am learning from ConCom and Stoic Principles. The first lesson dealt with being a good friend to yourself. That was interesting, still thinking on that one, however I do wonder if it means you cannot treat others well until you can treat yourself well.

Make sense?

That is the foundation; lesson two is the ground floor, becoming a friend. What does that even mean? My theory, being someone you would want to be friends with. The difference between the first two lessons is the focus, outward and inward.

The third lesson correlated with Conflict Communications; encouraging others daily which makes you feel better and gains friends. I tied that with the ability to cross tribal/group boundaries by treating everyone with respect to find that you can move almost effortlessly between cultures and subcultures.

Lesson 4 also tied into ConCom, it is simply the active listening technique instead of waiting to reply. Street level intelligence gathering as Rory called it. Lesson 5 brought to mind stoicism’s levels of control, forgiveness. If you do not do it, the grudge will turn into a cancer eating your enjoyment of life. You can control how you handle it, or try to influence others, though ultimately that is their choice. In the grand scheme of things how important is the transgression based on the scale of your lifetime.

Sixth lesson was about laughing and not taking yourself too seriously, it is supposed to attract others. Well, how fun is someone when they are moody? I think it also has a hand in keeping your ego in check as well.

Final lesson, learn how to say I love you; the key is to mean it. I know full well how short and abruptly taken away life is, do not miss an opportunity to show that. Overall, it was a good book that hooked me, glad Jaime gave me a copy.

Do You Want to Argue How It’s Done or Fix the Problem?

Posted in Blogging, Books, Commentary, Current Events, Inner Strength, Introspection, Life, Philosophy with tags , , , , , , , , on April 15, 2014 by Ronin

I have been studying a book by a favorite author, slightly off-topic from his usual work that I am finding to be a veritable gold mine. It is entitled Conflict Communications or ConCom for short, and if you type that into Amazon’s search bar, you will be taken to condoms. Fun Fact.bruce-lee-quote-to-know-oneself-is-to-study-oneself-in-action-with-another

Either way it breaks down social conflict, its predictability, how to work around it so you can fix the real issue. I can sum it up like this, ‘do you want to argue how things are done or fix the problem?’ With this new knowledge, I started testing it, watching others and myself when we interact.

 

One incident is a former friend who found veganism, who enthusiastically embraced it, making it part of his self-identity. He dropped me, maybe because I am not a vegan, I do not know. However, I see the reasoning. Think about something that you love to do so much you make time for it. With me, it is hard style kettlebell training and Jeet Kune Do/Kali.

Now someone says what you do sucks, even just questions its effectiveness, or tells you that you are getting just a little preachy. How does that make you feel? If we feel anything that is the limbic system in our brain is firing in the Triune Brain Model, where the emotions reside and when they trigger our rationality starts to climb out the window.

Have you ever been able to reason with someone in an intense argument? I used to get in political arguments all the time for example, and it usually gets down to how someone feels things should be done. Not a cold blooded, logical by the numbers calculation. It happens to me, it happens to you, and when we get emotional, I know now, that I cannot accomplish anything of substance until I have calmed down.

I found Stoic Principles help with that, along with not taking things so serious. I mean, if I cannot put it in a bag and carry it, it is not that serious of an issue. Reasoned debate is more fun that way, and out of context analogies are kept to a minimum. I found that not verbally attacking someone by telling them they are wrong would go a lot further to getting them to give your way a try. This principle works with all areas of life, politics, religion, even every day communication. After all, in the end, unless it keeps us alive, the rest is the story you tell. Interesting, but unnecessary.images (3)

 

A Leg Of The Journey Ends

Posted in Authors, Books, Commentary, Current Events, Inner Strength, Introspection, Life, writing with tags , , , , , , , on April 7, 2014 by Ronin

Week 35

Final week revealed quite a bit as far as my foundation and where to go from there. What drives me out of bed had not changed at all over the last four introspections. Going to the next level, I revisited the Soul Diamond from TWIWC II to discover a near 180-degree turn from before. It has four quadrants/hearts: lion, dragon, eagle, and angel, where I had no qualities before, I had shifted to them and where I had some qualities, I now had none in that area.

Looking over the Unchained questions again, I found my life’s path had changed, I had woke up and working to be a better person. A work-in-progress, but progress, with some glitches from the last few months being ironed over time. I was reminded of the perception and reality not being the same, a topic I hit enough that I should have remembered it. Combined with ConCom I should have enough tools and explanations for the new path I undertake.

The Journey Continues

Posted in Books, Commentary, Current Events, Inner Strength, Introspection, Life with tags , , , , , , on April 1, 2014 by Ronin

Week 34

This week I revisited, for the fourth time, the questions from Unchained. Awhile back, I took an in-depth look inside during a blog post series entitled ‘Forging Ronin’. The revisit showed some startling changes in focus from inward to outward.

I still have some issues but I am slowly pulling their teeth one-by-one. I am also learning to do what helps with your recovery, if it works to minimize or to stop instead of drowning or burying it then do it. It will be okay, some may not understand however, everyone’s path is a bit different. Mine has taken me on a search for ways to deal with it, rediscovering and starting again; scarred, slightly wounded, yet more mature and stronger.

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